Some Background and Three Ways I’m Engaging in the Racial Tensions Around Me

I’ve had a lot of conversations these past few months with my friends about racism. I haven’t heard the same perspective twice. Everyone is coming at this from a different place and for different reasons. It’s all literally complicated for a million reasons and emotions are on tilt. The labels everyone puts on everyone else aren’t helping. From “They are all Marxists!” to “They are all Murderers!” we’ve got the pedal to the medal.

I’ve yet to meet a person (and group of people, for that matter) who appreciates being labeled. Like, “Thanks bro, I love that you labeled me and my people that way, that is really helpful and makes me feel so appreciated and understood” said no one, ever.

Yet it’s everywhere. “Cops do this”…”Black people are like this”…”White people need to”… and on and on. Those clothes don’t fit any group just right. Instead of engaging in real listening and learning, we simply expel others into categories such as “irrelevant” or “venomous” depending on our most recent emotion or what is going through our mind palaces at the moment. Let’s call it “mental segregation,” for the sake of simplicity. Everyone is choosing sides and everyone is pointing at everyone else. Lots of denial, lots of disagreement and dissent is so, so woke.

It seems difficult-to-near-impossible to find “The Truth” amidst all the conflicting voices, posturing, accusations and violence upon violence. This isn’t a new battle. We’ve all been disagreeing about this for hundreds of years and our history isn’t pretty, it’s gruesome.

Oh, yeah, speaking of the violence. There’s been a lot of that. At least that’s one thing we can all agree on. In the past and right now. It doesn’t seem like we are gonna stop that any time soon. Worst of all is the violence we are committing against one another. Human to human. face to face. soul to soul.

Violence comes in many forms. It isn’t always loud or hot, or mob-like. Sometimes it’s quiet, cowardly, and elusive. Truthfully, I don’t know which form is worse. Somehow all of it has the result of shattering lives. Some people are mad at the shouting. Others are mad at the silence. And many of us don’t know where the middle is or if we should even try to find it. There are so many ways to hurt one another these days. We all want a hand to help us up but all we see are fists.

My red heart breaks over the reality of my world. Not just the world around me, but probably worse, the world inside of me. I wish I had the answers. I wish I knew what to do. I wish I could help more. I wish I didn’t have to pray with the Psalmist, “search me and know my heart, oh God. Try me and know my thoughts. and show me if there is any wicked way within me, please lead me to your perfect everlasting path.” (Psalm 139:23-24).

That is one of the scariest prayers in all of Scripture. I’m pretty sure if I leave the airbrushing aside, I’m worse than I think I am.

Dallas Willard has been most helpful to me in understanding what sin is and how forceful it is within my own DNA. In his book Renovation of the Heart: Putting on the Character of Christ, Willard covers Romans 7 which is where Scripture states that sin dwells within us, within our very flesh. Another way of saying it is that the sin in our life is deep, deep, deep.

This explains the phenomenon of the Apostle Paul and everyone else doing what we DON’T want to do, and NOT doing the things we should (Rom. 7:15). In these moments, Willard says, “it really is no longer I who is doing it, but the sin still functioning as a living force in the members of my body” (See esp. Romans 7:23).

Willard asks, “Where do these sinful inclinations reside?” His answer is startling because Scripture is startling: “They primarily exist in the parts of our body…hands, feet, shoulders, eyebrows, loins, tongue, overall posture…and this sin within us can play upon our tendencies to trap us, ensnare us, use us and destroy us.” Our sin is an expert destroyer and it resides deep within the recesses of our flesh.

So we aren’t suprised to hear the tongue described in Scripture as a fire which defiles the body (James 3:5-6) or “haughty eyes” or “hands that shed innocent blood,…feet that run quickly to do evil” (See Proverbs 6:17-18). This all has implications for me. Every time I enter into a conversation about racism, I have to start humbly. I may have something inside I don’t want.

I need to be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry” (James 1:19) as I explore any sinful tendencies that may be residing within me, potentially so deep I’m unawares. Racism isn’t the only sin that may be in there, but it’s possible that it’s one of many sins on the list. For me to deny that as impossible would be the height of gullibility.

I’m speaking of myself, of course. For me, If there is any sin that I claim to be immune to, as if I’m all set forever because I’m strong enough or enlightened enough or educated enough, or whatever, then I reserve the right for all my friends to push back with some reality b/c that sin is probably the one I’m most in danger of at that moment. Pride always comes before a fall.

If racism is sin, and it is, then I choose to treat racism like I do any other sin. For example, like pride, and hatred, and lust and envy, and love for money, and everything else. I have to war against it and be willing to admit that I’ve got a long way to go before it’s all rooted out.

All that to say, I’m not sure anyone has the higher ground here, especially me. I think we’ve all got a lot to learn. I am so far from where God wants me to be. So I thank God for his grace and it’s His grace that keeps me going. I’m not giving up. I’m trying to do my part, however insignificant it is. God isn’t asking me to be in control of the results, only to be faithful with the little that I have. God can take care of the rest.

So, back to why I started this blog post in the first place: What have I been doing to engage in the racial tensions around me? Well, initially I turned to books and articles but I found that to be less helpful than I’d like. Surprisingly so. Almost every article I see online is polarizing which seems to me to be part of the problem, not part of the solution. If we fight polarization with polarization, polarization wins every time.

In real life, the whole reading in this area experience turns out to be utterly antaganostic. Even in the Northeast where we externally value education and learning, one feels like every book from every side and angle is “off limits” to some other group or individual out here for some reason. Entire books are immediately dismissed no matter the credentials of the writer or the quality of the arguments.

Everyone’s got a reason to hate on the literature. Then it’s all, “I can’t believe you’d read THAT!” and down and down it goes. So, one has to mostly read in secret these days so as to not get lambasted too often and one can rarely cite an expert within conversation. For better or for worse, the literature doesn’t seem to be facilitating a ton of camaraderie at this time.

So, instead of focusing on reading more, I’ve begun engaging in three actions, primarily.

1. I’ve been listening to pastors preach about racism. Pastors from all over the country, from all different backgrounds, and many different ethnicities. I’ve found these sermons to be much more helpful than any articles or books. Not sure why that is, but typically the tone of the pastor is loving even as it challenges the status quo of a church community and even when the material isn’t comfortable. A different spirit pervades it and I’m able to grapple with the truth in a deeper way than when I simply read a book or the latest article floating around from someone I don’t know. It’s pretty easy to do this. Simply tune into pastors who I trust and respect, and listen to what they say about this issue. It’s been incredibly helpful to me. I don’t agree with everything I hear, but I am gaining a lot of perspective.
2. I’ve initiated conversations with my friends who are cops. I’ve found these conversations to be really helpful. These conversations are unlike anything I’m seeing online. They are filled with nuance, wisdom, experience and Godly perspective. I’m mostly just listening and asking questions. These conversations give me hope.
3. I’ve initiated conversations with my friends who are not white. I’ve found these conversations to be really helpful. These conversations are unlike anything I’m seeing online. They are filled with nuance, wisdom, experience and Godly perspective. I’m mostly just listening and asking questions. These conversations give me hope.

That’s it. Lots of listening and lots of conversations. These three actions have given me a lot to think about, a lot to pray about, and a lot of future learning to do. That’s what I’m doing, and that’s what I’ll continue to do until God shows me otherwise. Thanks for letting me share!